How to Talk to Your Son About Figures Like Andrew Tate
If your son has mentioned Andrew Tate, or if you have noticed his name appearing in your son’s viewing history or conversations, you are not alone. He has been one of the most widely watched online figures among teenage boys globally, and his content has reached boys significantly younger than his stated target audience.
Here is how to approach the conversation in a way that actually works.
Understand What You Are Dealing With First
Andrew Tate is a British-American former professional kickboxer turned online personality who built a large following producing content about success, masculinity, wealth, and gender relationships. His content has been publicly controversial for the positions he has stated, and he has faced serious legal proceedings in Romania, details of which are a matter of public record and ongoing court processes.
His appeal to boys is not primarily about his legal situation or his most extreme statements — it is about the confidence, the financial success narrative, and the direct messaging about male identity that characterises much of his content. Boys are drawn to the energy and the apparent clarity of the worldview, not necessarily to the most controversial elements.
Do Not Lead With Condemnation
The instinct when you discover your son has been watching content you find concerning is to express that concern directly and immediately. With adolescent boys especially, this approach tends to produce the opposite of what you intend. If you attack something your son finds interesting or compelling, he is likely to defend it — and to disengage from the conversation.
Lead with curiosity instead. “I have seen a few of his videos. What do you find interesting about him?” That question communicates that you are taking his perspective seriously rather than dismissing it before he has had a chance to explain it.
Engage With What Is Genuinely Appealing
There are elements of this kind of content that connect to legitimate things boys want: to be successful, to be respected, to know what strength looks like, to feel like they are capable of building a good life. Acknowledging those genuine desires — “I understand why the success stuff is interesting” — creates the conditions for a real conversation rather than a lecture.
From there, you can introduce questions rather than conclusions. “What do you think about the way he talks about women?” “Does that match your experience of the women in your life?” “Do you think the guys who follow his advice actually end up happier?” These questions invite critical thinking rather than compliance.
The Longer Conversation
One conversation is not enough. This is an ongoing dialogue, not a single intervention. The goal is not to get your son to agree with you about this particular figure. It is to keep the channel of communication open so he brings his questions and confusions to you rather than only to the internet.
Your Practical Takeaway
If your son has been watching this kind of content, ask one question this week — not a challenge, a genuine question. “What do you find interesting about him?” Listen to the full answer before you respond. What he says will tell you more about where he is than anything you could find by researching the content yourself.
[INTERNAL LINK: Read our guide on how to keep communication open with your son about what he watches for the ongoing conversation approach.]